theynege , avatar

folks who find small talk draining, what are some talking points you would give if you were asked why you don't say hi to people in places like elevators for buildings where you live or work? I probably seem like a jerk to my more social neighbours because I only stop to say hi to dogs (and implicitly their owners, but it's secretly about the dog) when I see them, even if I see them regularly. This morning I was going through what I might say to explain it. I'm undecided on whether I want to curtail myself or info dump to make a point.

I live in a high rise building on the top floor, so I take elevators all the time. Same with work, though I have to partially mask there anyway so that's just a typical part of my day. I just wonder if I can handle this in a more effective way.

btaroli , avatar

@theynege I would start by responding that no one should have to explain themselves. Why is everyone naturally expected to buy into expectations?

I would simpnyiffer that people don’t often just socialize because. We often require some shared connection before we engage with people, partly because this requires a real expenditure of mental energy. And if we’re already drained for other reasons then it’s even less likely to occur.


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